it seems like so much is going on, yet at the same time i feel like i'm not doing anything. for the first 18 years of my life i was completely surrounded by people i loved and constantly spent time with. I did so many things and i was involved in so much. I feel like i lived those years with so much passion and vigor.
Now... i feel old and tired. i am technically
"busy" but i fee like i do very little. I find my current situation to be embarrassing... and selfish. I keep telling myself that i just have to wait until the next step, until i'm somewhere where i can be established. But i don't want to be telling myself that anymore. I regret not being involved here. i think i let my bitterness and anger keep me from doing anything at all. and i probably missed out on some good t
hings because of it.
when i woke up this morning, i was trying to remember the last time i actually had physically touched another human... like when was the last time i hugged someone. i couldn't remember.
I really wanted a hug today.
okay, my pity-party is over.
i actually am really happy and excited for the first time in a long time.
i'm getting married. yep. jenna rose hazelet is getting married. turns out i don't like cats (thereby ruining my plans to be a crazy cat lady with the blue eyeshadow) and there is someone who is really kind of perfect for me. we are happy and committed (i'm not just saying these words. there is so much meaning behind all of this. we have gone through a lot as a young couple and we work really hard to keep our focus on Christ and to be where we are).
but block off your calenders in december everyone...because if we can make it through the planning, there is going to be a wedding!!!
2 comments:
On behalf of PNC Bank, I want to say congratulations on your engagement! There’s nothing better than seeing two people in love. As you know, the next few months will be chaotic (ask Mom!) as you plan your dream wedding. This is one of the reasons why PNC developed the new Virtual Wallet (URL), an online money management tool that puts you in control and helps you get a better handle on your money. Get peace of mind by getting a full calendar view of what money you have coming in and going out. And it makes it easy to save towards the things you want. That way you can focus on what’s really important now…like the color of your bridesmaids’ dresses!
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um.. what?
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